The unpredictable events ofThis thing we call Life
by LizeM
Summary: My take on how things could go between Barney and Robin in season 7 :  please review!
1. Chapter 1

|The unpredictable events of this thing we call 'life'|

_*… _

**today, Maclaren's Pub**

"Hey Robin! It's been over a week since we last saw you here!" Lily greeted her from their usual booth, raising her beer.

"Yeah, Robin, thank you for delighting us with your sublime presence…" said Marshall ironically, imitating his wife's movements without looking at Robin.

"It's nice to see you too, Marshall." said Robin tiredly, practically throwing herself onto the booth next to Ted, who offered her some of his drink.

"Marshall is right, Robin." said Ted friendly, stopping for just a second to watch his best friend take a little satisfied bow "We haven't seen you in days. We were starting to get worried…"

Robin opened her mouth, but Lily was way quicker than her "Yes, we should probably call Barney and tell him you're alive! He's been asking for you all week…" Lily's little smile was greeted by a loud 'umph' coming from Robin.

"What is it?"

"It's about him." Robin closed her eyes solemnly as she said this, but when she noticed none of her friends seemed to have noticed how serious the situation was, she went on "I need to talk to you guys…"  
>The serious tone in her voice shook her friends who were now sitting up straight with concern in their eyes.<p>

"What's wrong?"

It was only several seconds later that Robin said, biting her lower lip  
>"Something happened with Barney."<p>

\\

**8 days earlier**

_Barney joined the little group stealing a chair form a nearby table. _

"_Good evening, everybody!" a big smile lighted his face up._

"_Seems like someone's really happy today!" Lily pointed out, smiling back "Are things going well with Nora?"_

"_They are going great! I mean: take a look at the hotness of the girls around here. I haven't fantasized about any of them and it's already been… three minutes!" everybody laughed taking a sip… Everyone but Robin, who seemed to have developed an intense interest in her empty glass. "Well, I guess my record is already over" Barney went on, pointing at his friend "Robin, that shirt is way too revealing for me not to notice you expanding boobs." he teased her._

_But Robin's eyes had absolutely no intention of leaving the table._

"_So, Barney… did you and Nora just… you know…" began Marshall, winking at his friend "is that why you look so happy? Did you just…"_

_Barney's answer was the first verse of their beloved "Bangity-Bang" song. Marshall and Ted soon joined in, happy and excited._

"_GUYS!" Robin interrupted with a desperate cry. "Guys, please stop!" she said rubbing her forehead._

"_Honey, what's wrong?" a concerned Lily gently placed her hand over Robin's._

"_It's just… please stop the sex references. I haven't had sex in months, I'm extremely susceptible… and Lily move your hand before I jump you."_

_As Lily promptly removed her hand from the table with Marshall's help, Ted pointed out  
>"Is that why you're dressed like that? Are you planning on sleeping with a random guy tonight?"<em>

"_Exactly. Now if you'll excuse me, I've just spotted a very charming blond man in his thirties over there."_

"_Hellooo!" said Barney pointing at himself with a grin._

"_I think she means that balding forty-year-old slightly overweight who is currently drinking his fifth beer at the counter."_

_Everybody looked several times from the stranger to Robin with unbelieving eyes._

"_He'll do." was her answer to their silent question. And with that, she stood up and walked towards him._

\\

**today**

"Yes, well, we all remember you 'very charming' latest conquest…" Ted teased her trying to get her to smile, but her sad expression seemed to be permanent.

"You guys remember that guy and I went up to the apartment?" everybody nodded "Well… we were soon joined by Barney."

\\

**8 days earlier**

_Robin tried to ignore the repeated knocking on her door, but was eventually forced to open it._

"_What?" she blurted out at the sight of Barney._

"_Hey Robin… woah!" he said, surprised of her missing shirt "I can see you skipped the foreplay!"_

"_What do you want, Barney?" _

"_Ok, first of all, I like the way that bra supports your boobs: they look more-"_

"Barney!"

"Ok, Robin… you really shouldn't sleep with this guy." he finally said, with his eyes almost pleading her not to.

"_What?" she was shocked "Give me at least three good reasons not to."_

"_Well… you don't know him and-"_

"_Oh, like that stopped you from sleeping with anything that moved, in the past."_

"_Robin… that's different."_

"Why?"

_When Barney was about to put his answer into words, a middle-aged man came out of Robin's bedroom, wearing nothing but his boxers and shoes._

"_Rosy, is everything ok?"_

"_No, unknown-man-who-clearly-has-no-taste-in-matching-his-boxers-with-his-shoes, it's not ok-"_

\\

**today**

"Wait, does Barney match his shoes with his boxers?" Marshall seemed to be extremely thrilled at the idea.

"Dude, _shush_!"

\\

**8 days earlier**

"_-'Rosy' and I are having a serious discussion here." Barney half-screamed, hating the man for interrupting._

"_It's all right, Henry. Barney was just leaving, wasn't he?" Robin asked with a furious look on her face, staring angrily at barney with wide eyes._

"_Yes, of course I was." the disappointment in his voice could be heard miles away as he walked towards the door "and, Henry?"_

"_Yeah?"_

"She used to be a man." and with that, Barney was out.

\\

**today**

"Ouch!" Ted couldn't be more clear.

"Yes, and after that, Henry left blabbing some excuses." Robin looked more and more mortified by the second.

"Well Robin, I'm sorry Barney ruined you 'date', but is that really why you look so terrible?" Lily asked and Marshall nodded in agreement.

"There's more… Barney came back."


	2. Chapter 2

**today**

"_Well Robin, I'm sorry Barney ruined you 'date', but is that really why you look so terrible?" Lily asked and Marshall nodded in agreement._

"_There's more… Barney came back."_

"Did he? I mean, after telling your 'date' you used to be a man, and knowing you love for guns, I would have just run for my life…" Marshall stated, taking a sip.

"What did he say?"

"Well…" Robin began.

\\

**8 days earlier**

"_Henry, wait!" but the man was already out of the apartment, holding his trousers in his hands._

'_Damn!' Robin thought to herself. 'Why did Barney have to do that?'  
>A single loud knock shook her thoughts. She quickly made her way towards the door and opened it, hoping for it to be Henry, but the unwelcomed sight of Barney drive her mad.<em>

"_What-do-you-want?" screaming, she spelled each word slowly._

"_Robin, I hope you're not mad at me." his words were sincere, showing his usual deficiency when it came to human relationships._

"_Of course I'm mad at you! Why did you have to do that?"_

"_But, Robin don't you understand? I did that for you: you shouldn't sleep with a stranger just because you haven't had sex in a while…"_

"Barney, please. Coming from you that is just ridiculous!" she was still screaming, and this time Barney didn't keep a low tone either.

"_This is not about me! It is about you, and I don't want you to sleep with that 'Ernest'!"_

"_Henry!"_

"_Whatever he's called, I don't want you just have sex with him!"_

"_Why? What's wrong with him?" she didn't really care for Henry, but she was really curious to see where Barney was getting at, and his nonsense was just enraging her fury. She stepped closer to him, her hands on her hips, looking straight into his eyes. Challenging him._

"_Well, maybe I don't want you to sleep with anyone!" he screamed louder that any of them had done that night, as if the words came out of his mouth without him really wanting them to._

"_What?" she lowered her voice, taken aback. "Why?" she asked, surprised and sceptic._

"_Well… I…" Barney spluttered out, panting "I…"_

_They were dangerously getting closer to each other, one's breath bouncing against the other's face-_

_\\_

**today**

"O my God, you kissed!"

"Lily! Let me finish…" said Robin nervously.

\\

**8 days before**

**-**_their eyes closed as they leaned in closer to the other._

"_Leave."  
>Robin suddenly stepped away from the man with great effort. She turned around, not wanting him to see her cry, leaving a confused, frozen Barney <em>**. **

_"Please Barney, leave…" her red eyes were now filled with tears as she talked to him. He remained silent, still on the spot "If something was to happen between us, I wouldn't feel the same way as you would…" taking a deep breath, she decided to tell him what she had been holding in form months… maybe even more than a year. "Barney I have... I have feelings for you."_

The man was just staring at her, as if he could never blink again.

"_If something was to happen between us, it would just be another number to you, another story for you Playbook. But for me, it would be more… much more." she looked desperate, desperate for him to tell her wrong. But he said nothing. "Besides, you have a good thing going with Nora… you wouldn't want to spoil it for someone like me…" she laughed trying to make her idea sound ridiculous, still… desperately hoping for him to take her seriously._

… _But again, after moments of silence, she simply repeated "Leave Barney, leave. For everyone's sake."_

_and he was out._

_\\_

**today**

"He didn't say ANYTHING?" Marshall started.

"Not a 'Robin I care for you too.'?" tried Lily.

"Not a 'Let's talk about it'?" Ted went on.

"Not even 'Ok, I'm leaving… I have to drop by the grocery, is there anything you need?"

"Baby!" Lily told Marshall after his latest, very insensitive, guess. "Robin I'm sorry he didn't say anything, but maybe he was confused, maybe he didn't know what to say… aren't you being a bit too hard on him?"

"That's not why I'm mad…" Robin confessed, turning Ted's glass in her hands.

"It isn't?"

"There's more… Barney came back."

_TBC…_

_*… _

=) hope you liked it!  
>I'll update soon, if the story gets at least a few reviews<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey! =)  
>Sorry for taking this huge amount of time to publish, but my computer broke down. Now I have to transfer all the pages I've written on paper on my PC… it's going to take ages :S but I'll do my best =)<strong>

_**/**_

"_Robin I'm sorry he didn't say anything, but maybe he was confused, maybe he didn't know what to say… aren't you being a bit too hard on him?"_

"That's not why I'm mad…" Robin confessed, turning Ted's glass in her hands.

"_It isn't?"_

"_There's more… Barney came back."_

"O my God…" Lily couldn't express the gang's feelings better, and Robin seemed to agree as she said

"Yeah…"

**/**

**8 days earlier**

_Robin quickly drank all the water she had poured in her favorite mug. She would have fallen on the kitchen floor if it hadn't been for her hands firmly set on the counter, keeping her balance. Rivers of tears kept falling from her eyes, regardless of her efforts to embank them._

_Why did she have to love him so much? Why did Barney Stinson, with all of his issues, games and bad behaviors have to be the one man in the world she was in love with? Why did she want him that bad, and why did he want, someone else just as bad?_

_Suddenly, she was frightened by the loud noise of the front door being opened shut. Without notice, without saying anything and without asking for permission Barney came running towards her. Pushing her against the counter, he trapped her and stopped for just a second to look into her eyes _

"_I can't resist you Robin Scherbatsky … I just can't." he told her breathing hard, placing his right hand forcefully behind her head. Robin couldn't move, and didn't want to as his mouth came crushing on hers with such force, she felt her knees fall and desperately held grip of Barney's shoulders not to._

_In what seemed to be a heartbeat, he was lifting her up on the counter, kissing every inch of her he could reach.  
>She knew that was wrong, she knew it wasn't going to end up well, but as her hands ran through his hair, all Robin could think about was the man in front of her, and how much she loved him.<em>

"_Barney, we shouldn't do this…" Robin managed to say, gasping, as Barney kissed her neck._

_He didn't seem to hear her._

"_Barney, look at me!" her voice was strong and imperative and, breathing hard, the young man raised his head. "Barney, if we do this… I need you to know it would mean something to me. I need you to know how much I care for you."_

He stared into those beautiful eyes for a moment, and then kissed her with all he had.

**/**

**today**

"You WHAT?"

"Please tell me you stopped there!" was Ted's request, but even he knew it was rhetorical.

"But, Robin… Barney is with Nora, now…" Lily tried to sound casual, but her voice showed how she blamed the woman in from of her.

"I know what you think, Lily! But it's not like I've taken advantage of him, or something!" Robin widened her eyes in protest.

"Barney betrayed his girlfriend" Marshall said "there is no excuse for that! I would never do that to my Lilypad, and I can't even think what I'd do if she did! Still… it's not like he did this on his own…" Marshall's latter remark was definitely not welcome.

"Maybe we shouldn't have done it, ok!" Robin was growing impatient to end the story, sure as she was that her friends would have supported her, in the end. "But that's not why I'm this mad…"

"I'm almost afraid to hear it, now." said Ted, sadly taking a sip of Marshal's beer.

**/**

**8 days earlier**

_Two bodies laid on the living room floor, still partially dressed._

Robin stared at the man next to her, tilting her head slightly to the left. She couldn't help but smile at the sight of his messy hair, knowing her hands were the cause for it. It had been even better than she had remembered. He looked so deeply lost in thoughts at that moment, he looked just to handsome…

_She couldn't help it: she reached out her hand and touched his cheek. _

_Then Robin abruptly fell from the soft cloud she had been suspended on. He moved away just as her skin touched his._

_In a moment, he was standing up, putting all his clothes on. _

_Robin took a minute to understand what was happening "Barney?" she asked, with disbelief in her voice._

"_Robin, I'm sorry, I really am…" he blabbed, picking up his tie "but Nora and I, you know…" he rushed to the door, short of breath "we've got something good going on, and I don't want to spoil it." Barney was now out, ready to close the door behind him "you understand, right?" he asked, and left without waiting for an answer._

_Robin didn't move, everything around her was quiet, even her tears made no sound.  
>Everything was still in the room, the sun still shone, and her heart was broken.<em>

**/**

**today**

"Damn!" Ted felt rage rise inside him, how dare someone treat Robin that way? The fact that that certain someone was Barney, only made things worse.

"God…" Marshall couldn't believe what he'd just heard. His disappointment towards Barney grew bigger and bigger as he processed all the information Robin had given them.

Lily was furious, if Barney had been there, she would have certainly given him her "you're-dead-to-me" look.

"Yeah… I told him I cared and he…" Robin's eyes were glistening, as if they had never stopped, from that moment eight days before. "I was just like one of his bimbos."

They were all silent for a few minutes, just staring at the wooden table.

"Damn!"

"Yes, Ted, you already said that!" blurted out Robin.

"No, I mean, _damn!" _repeated the man, looking over his best friend's shoulder "Barney's here."

_**/**_

**thank you for all your reviews, I really appreciated them =)  
>remember to let me know what you think ;)<strong>


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